Day 1

Okay to make all my emotions and feelings write now as one word i would have to say hell. This is honestly what I get for starting it and doing 8 days and then quitting... good grief... I had to stop 4 times to catch my breath or let my muscles stop seizing...It almost felt harder than it was the very first time I had ever done it... (If anyone is wondering I am doing the 30 day shred dvd)

Not even halfway through the workout I could feel the sweat beading on my forehead... that has never happened... I kept pushing myself and I finished with a shine on my skin and the feeling of being completely drained. Even as I type this there are sweat beads going down my back.

Don't get me wrong I do feel accomplished that I did it with only 4 breathers. And I even have a hint of excitement for tomorrows workout... Though I do have to admit as I am human there is that little voice in the back of my mind asking if I am crazy, and truth is no. I am not crazy I have reached the end of my rope with myself... All the excuses and the lack of confidence that I know have. I want to be able to go shopping and just pick what I want instead of what fits. I want to be able to feel proud to walk down the street or run around the splash pad with the little sweethearts. These are things I want, and now that I have joined forces with others that want the same thing... Well needless to say I feel empowered. I feel ready to fight, to give it all I got and really push myself. When I did my first weigh in (for this mission and for the first Monday of all this) I was not proud. I will admit it. And it made me angry with myself that I spent all this time feeling sorry for myself instead of going for what I want... That time is over...I am through being a push over in my own life!!

START OF MISSION STATS AND FIRST MONDAY EVER STATS:
Age: 26
Height: 5' 3"
Weight: 229 . 2 lbs
Fat: 95 . 3 lbs
Percent of Fat: 41.6%
Percent of Water: 42.6%
Bone: 7.3%
BMI: 40.5

My BMI is going to be one of the most major things that pushes me along... Well onto a cold shower and bed... Hell awaits tomorrow -winks-

~*Poof*~